What If Criticism Is Something to Celebrate?

Photo by De'Andre Bush on Unsplash

I used to think that the best sign that I was doing well at something was if everyone was happy with me and my work (and my life choices, and my parenting, and my fill-in-the-blank).

That is often still true, especially if my goal is to go with the flow and to act in a supporting role to others.

But if I want to make a mark and do big things in the world? If I want to fully express myself and show up with my true voice?

Nope. I have a different benchmark for that now.

I now know that if I’m acting from my truest and most ambitious place, some people aren’t going to get it. Some people might not even like it. And that’s how I know that I’m on to something good.

Fact: People who do big things in the world, live by their own rules, and invite the rest of us to see things differently get criticized. PERIOD. 

(If you’d like some hard evidence, do this exercise I learned from Tara Mohr: Pick out one or two of your favorite authors—the ones you love the most, whose work affects you deeply—and read both the five-star reviews of their work and the one and two-star reviews. You might be surprised to see what people say about the authors you adore.)

When we receive criticism, our brains tend to go to one place: I did something wrong.

But is it possible that if you’re being criticized, you’re also one of those people doing something big, living by your own rules, and inviting the rest of us to see things differently?

And if that’s so, what if criticism isn’t something to endure and manage, but something to CELEBRATE?

What if criticism is a sure sign that you’re showing up in the ways that only YOU can?

I invite you to think differently about unhelpful criticism (which, I should note, I would separate from meaningful, constructive feedback that deserves our attention). 

What does criticism tell you about where you stand and about what you are trying to make real in the world? And is it possible that the more deeply you’re criticized, the closer you are to speaking with your truest voice?

Could criticism be a sign that you’re on to something good? 

Criticism might mean that you’re offering up something new, that you’re showing up in all your glorious truth, that you’re acting from a place of your deepest desires, or that you’re paving the way for someone else.

And that, my friend, is something to celebrate.

P.S. If you’d like some help discerning meaningful feedback from unhelpful criticism, or if you find that fear of criticism is keeping you stuck, I’ve got some game-changing coaching tools that I’d love to share with you. Visit here to learn more about working with me.