Cheers If You Care What People Think
Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
Many of us spend a lot of time beating ourselves up because we think we shouldn’t care what other people think, but we do care what others think.
We want to be free unicorns who dance through the world giving zero f*cks (but only the kind of zero f*cks that make people feel empowered and inspired because we also don’t want to be an asshole).
We have a whole cultural narrative around just being yourself and not caring what people think (so easy, right?). Unfortunately, for many of us that becomes another reason for us to judge ourselves and to feel like crap because we can’t figure out how to be that free-spirited unicorn.
Here’s what I want to offer you instead.
If you care what people think, I want you to know that you are deeply human. We are wired to belong.
If you care what people think, I want you to know that you are an evolutionary badass. Belonging is how humans have survived.
If you are sure you care too much about what people think, you are probably also highly sensitive and empathetic and compassionate. I want you to know that I deeply treasure those parts of you. The world needs more people like you.
Caring about what others think is not some innate flaw that needs to be corrected. There is nothing wrong with you.
But, I also know (and I know you do too) that caring too much about what people think can hold us back. It can stop us from living authentically, from embracing joy, and from showing up bigger in the world. I don’t want that for you; I want all of your parts to shine brightly (because remember, the world needs more people like you!).
Despite what Instagram may tell you, the solution is not affirmations or a sudden dose of confidence. There is no magic switch here that will turn you into a unicorn.
But you know what can help?
A new set of tools and practices so those highly sensitive, compassionate, deeply caring parts of you that keep a pulse on the world can shift back towards yourself.
Understanding how to treat those parts of you that care about belonging, and learning how to be in a different relationship with them.
Learning new, concrete ways to tap into your inner knowing so you can quiet the outside noise and figure out what’s true for you.
Structure and support, real-life practice, and a compassionate and supportive space to figure all of this out.
This is what I’d love to offer you in coaching - a chance to learn new ways of being so you can walk through the world being the most you you can possibly be. You don’t need to be a unicorn; you just need a new set of skills (skills most of us were never taught). Visit here to learn more about coaching.
